Being in a relationship can be a blissful, amazing and enchanting adventure. From sharing every special moment with the one you love, to being assured that you’ve found “The one”, getting cuffed is a phase in life every girl wants to fully bask in.
But besides all the giddy stuff, many things in a relationship still remain in question. To clear your mind off of the most annoying doubts, confusions or theories, run through our Relationship Questions and see if we could be of help!
- My partner likes pictures of other girls (on Instagram, for example). What do I do?
This is a VERY common complaint amongst many girls, especially those in a new relationship. It’s okay to get a little skeptical when your man is liking and commenting on other girls’ pictures, but you don’t need to get mad too fast.
Glance through the kinds of pictures he likes. Are the girls looking raunchy? Are they inappropriate pictures? How often does he like them? Analyze all this carefully and then be sure on the next step to take. Remember, just because he likes other female’s photos doesn’t mean he is unfaithful. Have some trust in him.
- My partner hasn’t gotten over his/her ex. What’s next?
This is another common complaint amongst people in relationships. Sometimes you fall in love with someone who is not completely over his/her ex. Breakups are hard, and most of them never end up pretty. Be your partner’s support system by helping him/her get over their previous relationship. Talk to your partner, visit a therapist, do whatever you can to make sure that the ex is out of your partner’s mind for good. If all your efforts are to no avail, and your man or woman is still stuck in the past, you can threaten to move on, maybe this will drive your partner to get his/her acts right.
To avoid being in such a quagmire, make sure that who ever you’re getting into a relationship with has wholly moved on from his/her ex. It’s also very common for people to date you, but only as an excuse to get over a former lover, so, be careful that you’re not being used as a remedy.
- I feel threatened when other girls/guys find my partner attractive. Is this wrong?
It’s totally normal for people to feel a little threatened when the opposite sex finds their partner attractive. Sometimes, it reaches a level whereby you don’t want your significant other to hang out with people of the opposite sex; which is wrong. Give each other some freedom to associate with other people, and don’t be scared if anyone finds your partner attractive. In fact, feel flattered; you’re lucky you’ve managed to find someone good-looking to possibly spend the rest of your life with. Nonetheless, when other people start getting too physical, don’t be scared to step in and set some boundaries.
- My partner doesn’t say “I love you” so often, is that a problem?
It’s always an enthralling sensation when you hear the words “I love you” sip out of your partner’s mouth. But the truth of the matter is, the phrase “I love you” has become a rather overused one. Yes, a common reassurance that your partner loves you is satisfying, but does he/she really mean it? It’s better to have someone hardly say they love you, but show that they do through the way they behave. Besides, actions speak louder than words.
- My partner’s family doesn’t like me. Should I change for them?
Except your attitude or lifestyle is negatively affecting others, no, do not. You fell in love with your partner, not his/her family. If they don’t like you because of your dressing, or your job, or your religion, then that’s their problem and not yours.
Embrace who you are one hundred percent, and never feel the need to switch up who you are for other people. As long as you and your partner feel comfortable with each other, everything else is secondary. Although not getting enough support from his/her family can be discouraging, never be afraid to be yourself. Feel free to get your partner’s family to be on your good side. Have a serious talk with them, go on a trip together, spend more time with them and let everyone know who you really are. In time, they might be more accepting of you, and all the hate could be as a result of a silly misconception!
- My partner never tells me stuff; I always find out the truth instead. Do I confront him/her?
A relationship without openness is going to go south, and so honesty is truly the best policy. If your partner keeps secrets from you or constantly lies about things, you might have just set yourself up for disappointment. Each moment you find out the truth, confront or scold your partner about it, and let him/her know that there is no room for secrets and lies.
However, if the pretense still goes on, you may have no other choice but to leave. Being lied to is never a nice feeling, and everyone deserves to be in a relationship where trust and honesty reigns above anything else.
Call it quits when you’ve had enough, because you never know, he/she may have killed someone you love and lied about it.
- My partner has a best friend that is NOT me, is this wrong?
Sometimes, it’s nice to have a best friend who is your lover as well, but if that’s not the case for you, be accepting and move on. Your partner’s best friend may have been in his/her life since childhood, while you just came into the picture a few years ago. Don’t be the type to destroy a friendship and snatch a title because you think you’re “entitled” to it. Everyone is different, and who your partner chooses as his/her best friend is not really your concern. However, if you feel like your partner’s best friend is a negative influence on your relationship, then let your thoughts known. Also, if your partner constantly picks your best friend over you; then that might be a problem you’d need to resolve, quick!
- My partner never talks about our future together. (Getting married, starting a family, having children). Is this a problem?
Yes, this is a problem.
Many people fail to realize that a relationship is a potential marriage, and your girlfriend/boyfriend could be your future husband or wife. If you and your partner have been together for at least 1 year, and you have never discussed your life together, then there might be a hitch.
If he/she never starts the conversation, don’t be scared to say something. Go ahead and ask questions, and be sure that your partner does not mind spending the rest of his/her life with you.
If your partner becomes hesitant or uncomfortable when discussing your future and marriage life, see this as a red flag. Dating someone who is scared of taking the relationship to the next step is nothing but a waste of time. Make sure that who ever you’re with is open to advancing into higher levels in the relationship, because you can’t be “boyfriend and girlfriend” forever.
Remember to consider age and timing though. For example, if you are still teenagers or are in a brand new relationship, there is no need to rush. But if you believe you are ready for marriage and have been with your partner for a while, it’s important that you both discuss your future together before you become old and wrinkly!